Monday, August 29, 2011

If I had a big enough rock, I might crawl under it.

I feel like this today. I really do. Except I don't think anyone would ever know it. You probably hide it pretty well when you feel like this too. Don't ya! I think my dogs know. No, they absolutely know. My pup, Tango, a lab/weim mix (we call him the "lab on stilts') keeps bringing me things and setting them on my lap. Just a minute ago, it was one of my jogging shoes. CORRECTION: walking shoes. I'd like to run, but the theory of it sits better with me at the moment. Anyway, don't dogs always seem to know what our mood is just by parking themselves next to us? Thank Heaven for a tight-lipped, say nothing and just be there, best friend.

Anywho. I've spent the last five consecutive months straight trying to raise funds for my latest renovation and generate big time buzz for the organization and it's just been really wearing on me. This latest renovation is by far the largest and toughest one to date. But, it's also so totally, incredibly worthy and deserving of a new life. I just can't stop until I do this for them.

It's a greyhound rescue in Salisbury, MA. Get this -- 2,000 greyhounds saved and counting. They are too amazing. But, their shelter is in serious, serious need of help. This past weekend, when Hurricane Irene hit, I just about cringed every time the wind blew. I haven't heard anything about damage to the building, so I am taking that as good news thus far.

Today is just one of those days (actually, it's been more like the past week) when I feel totally defeated. It's like, 'what else can I do?' and combine it with 'what am I doing wrong?'. I am only half way through my fundraising goals and the renovation is supposed to be starting in a month. Now my hope is to get it done before the snow flies.

I've Twittered, Facebooked, emailed, direct mailed, YouTubed, silent auctioned, got on the radio, in the newspaper, presentationed, etc., etc. My head is spinning. I need that big break. Oh, and a vacation would be nice.

I heard someone say that anything that comes easy is not worth it. I need to remind myself of that. I am picturing this situation like a flower trying to push its way through the dirt to become what it's meant to be -- I just need to remember to watch where I am stepping!

So, fellow dreamers, grassrooters, passionists -- keep plugging. I truly believe that we will look back on our tough times and say, "all of it was worth it".

With gratitude,

Jill



1 comment:

  1. you rock. i came across your site today via freekibble.com. as i was watching, i was wondering how you had the ENERGY to take these projects on, and make them happen. i am in awe. few take on the bigger ideas and follow-through. you're human. of course you need to curl up when exhausted, and re-charge. be kind to yourself! and remember to sleep and eat.

    now, let's destroy and un-create your expression, "what am i doing wrong?" nothing! absolutely nothing. that thought will only wear you out, as it's not empowering. (i write this as much as a reminder for myself as for you, and anyone else who may read this.) i've recently learned we can re-write those thoughts with expressions such as, "what else is possible?", and "how does it get any better than this?" or any affirmations that ring true for you.

    you have so much possibility in front of you. you've inspired so many. and saved a barn full of horses (i teared up watching the video), and you're gonna help sooo many greyhounds.
    keep going! as i know you, and your team, will.

    many blessings,
    susan

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